[adult swim]

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

One Small Duck. One Deep, Dark Pond.

Ok, I'm moving out my mom's house in March. I'm scared and excited all at the same time. I'm excited to have my own place, live my own life, and express myself the way I want to express myself. I'm excited about decorating the house and having friends over.

I'm scared because I will have to take on a lot of responsibility on my own. I'm scared that I won't have a lot of money, be broke, or not be able to go places I used to go to. I'm scared that I will end up in debt.

I love my job, and I love what I do. But I don't make mad money. I'm making money to get by. Yet, a lot of people struggled and made it through. I always had a lot of things handed to me, maybe I need to get through this experience. I need to be a man about it, and do my thing.
In situations like this, it's always a good idea to talk to GOD.

Hey God,

Shawn here, good to feel you again. How's the universe coming along?
Anyway... Well the small group of atoms that encompass yours truly is finally moving out. Yes, its about time, but you know me better then anyone, so you know why it took so long. I know your proud of me, and everything I am, but I'm scared. But not scared in like"I'm going to hell" scared, more like, "I want to be the best me" scared. I just don't want to disappoint myself.
What's that? I shouldn't doubt myself, because that's like doubting the true essence of GOD. Yeah I know. That's easy for you to say when your on the other side, but I'm only human. I don't always know everything. I would love to be like Jesus, and be at one with GOD, and life, and help others realize there own penitential... I'm trying. I know that me moving out is just going to open up so many others things about myself I never realized. This is bigger then an apartment. Bigger then my job. Bigger then having a really cool living room decor. This is Shawn in the making.
Your right. I'll be alright. Thanks God, you always know the right thing to say to make me feel better. :)
Luv Ya,


  • Take from someone who has lived on his own for over 11 years now, its scary at times, and it is hard sometimes, but trust me it is so worth it all in the end and during the hard times, ain't nothing like having your own

    By Anonymous Jaqua, at 6:52 PM  

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